Strike Witches: This Week In Brittania!

Mike Ferreira (Editor) — September 3rd, 2010
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Pasty's Panties and Anime Dream present This Week In Brittania!

This week in Brittania, war is on the horizon. The Fightin' 501st Joint Fighter Wing is recruiting able-bodied young ladies to take part in the War on Pants! Be you from Fuso, Orussia, or even Karlsland to head to the front lines. That's right, special young ladies will be taking to the skies to fight for truth, justice, and the ability to go out in public in a tasteful set of Pasty's Panties! Go get 'em, girls!

The War on Pants is only the latest twist in the ongoing battle against the villainous Neuroi. That's right, the black baddies are still trying to push forward after victories in Orussia, Karlsland, and right here in Brittania. Oh, the humanity! The devastation has been brutal as homes are destroyed, and mothers walk home to childless homes! But don't lose hope, Brittania. The Flying 501st is fighting back! With strategic wins on our home soil, the Strike Witches continue to ensure that our country can rest easy.

The Witches are doing so well that they added a new person to their ranks. Fuso's latest pride and joy, Yoshika Miyafuji, joins the fighting 501st as a new recruit. While she hasn't been fully vetted yet, Yoshika will train with train under the Flying Doberman herself, Mio Sakamoto. At age 19 and over 500 downs, Sakamoto is the Witches' oldest, and most decorated fighter. But don't let her age fool you: Sakamoto continues to stun, as she slices through the opposition in battle after battle. It seems like there's no slowing this dame down! For those just tuning in, the Witches are the pride of the World Army, with girls from all over the world fighting on the front lines. From the Karlsland aces Barkland and Hartmann, to the mysterious Sanya Litvyak from Orussia, the Witches have a lot to be boastful of.

But just who are these aerial vixens? The Flying 501st is a crew of special young ladies with incredible talents. Those of us on the outside like to call it "magic", which gives the group's nickname its salt. The girls soar through the air in leg-mounted propellor crafts, called Striker units, as they tackle the Neuroi menace. These girls are made of sugar and spice, and everything that kicks Neuroi tail!

The good folks at the Gonzo Filmworks have chronicled the exploits of these heroic lasses over the past several months, which will be shown at your local theaters before you know it! The $4.99 per 30-minute reel seems steep, but the cost will be worth it as you watch these lovely ladies soar through the air like circus acrobats! The friendly filmographic geniuses at Gonzo caught the girls' most exciting moments, as they take to the air, or endure the daily rigors of the military life! You'll laugh, as Private Miyafuji stumbles through her training exercises. You'll cry as the drama between Barkhorn and her comatose sister drives her closer and closer to the edge! You'll marvel at the intense dogfights, all captured with amazing detail! You'll gasp in shock as these girls shun their pants and bare their bottoms for the camera! It's vile, it's vulgar, and it's scandalously entertaining!

Women and children should be advised that these young women do not subscribe to the notion of modesty. Bare bottoms and prim panties can be seen at every turn. Be warned that these young ladies are far from legal age! It's scandalous, it's vile, and it's creepy. But only the most depraved will focus on the pubescent skin show, as these dames soar through the air with ease.

The exploits of the Strike Witches will be showing at your local matinee very soon! Fellas, once again be warned that you should leave the ladies at home for this one. The action may be too intense, and the scandalous sex appeal may be far too saucy for them! Still, do yourselves a favor and run, don't walk to the theater, to support the Witches as they fight their War on Pants!

This has been The Week in Brittania, brought to you by Pasty's Panties and Anime Dream! For fine panties that won't let you down at 40,000 feet, choose Pasty's! And for the news that matters, count on the sleuths at Anime Dream.