The content of this piece was written on a viewing of the first episode of My Bride is a Mermaid on February 3, 2010. Edits have been made for spelling and grammar, but the rest is completely untouched, and un-edited from the original Twitter feed.

5:03 PM: While I prepare, let's get the usual out of the way. :)

5:03 PM: My Bride Is a Mermaid:

5:04 PM: Directed by Seiji Kishi

5:05 PM: Animated by AIC, Avex, and Gonzo [-shudder- Damn you, Magikano... you made me hate Gonzo! D: ]

5:05 PM: 26 episodes, premiered on 4/1/2007

5:05 PM: Opening Theme: Romantic Summer by SUN & LUNAR

5:06 PM: Official Japanese Title: Seto no Hanayome

5:06 PM: I think that covers it. :) Stay tuned! I'll be back for the 'shows in 4!

5:12 PM: Coffee's done - time to begin! :D

5:12 PM: "Summer - the Seto Inland Sea" -> "Mio Sun Beach"

5:12 PM: ...cue drowning man.

5:13 PM: ohp... drowned man.

5:13 PM: "Somebody... help me ;-;" Saved :o

5:14 PM: "A... mermaid? '-'" Yeah, delusions are supposedly like that >->

5:14 PM: cut to water crashing on waves... epic!

5:14 PM: or something

5:15 PM: Really, I'm expecting the Hakusensha logo to pop up or something

5:15 PM: "Obligation is the sincerest form of insanity ^_^" ...quite true.

5:15 PM: Opening - sugary-sweet vocals into bouncy electric guitar

5:16 PM: "A Ninkyo love comedy!"

5:16 PM: Really not digging the character designs for this - they're pretty generi- Hey! Afro dude! :O Show me more of him!

5:16 PM: Giant enemy octopus!

5:16 PM: Will they hit his weak point for massive damage? :D

5:17 PM: Episode 1: THE YAKUZA WIFE" - complete with cheesy 1970s-ish "Drama" flourish

5:17 PM: Main character yawning... he's as bored as I am.

5:17 PM: "Are we there yet? I'm tired of this! D:" ...amen :(

5:18 PM: The guy has a name - Michishio Nagasumi

5:18 PM: who went to the beach to visit his grandma

5:18 PM: "There's only one bus per hour! o_o" Sounds like Warren >_>

5:19 PM: More "riding" footage

5:19 PM: "Water on your right, and mountains on the left... that's Seto for you!"

5:19 PM: predicting it now - Grandma's crazy in the head somehow.

5:20 PM: Prayer to the ancestors - "You made your grandpa happy ^_^"

5:20 PM: Michishio's grandma = typical old lady... how disappointing

5:20 PM: "He's not much of a student :D" ...encouraging parents, I see

5:21 PM: "Yer daddy was even worse at studyin'! :3" See above

5:21 PM: Michishio's kind of a fop. Very bland.

5:21 PM: "NAGASUMI! ^_^" His dad frightens me.

5:22 PM: ...he's standing in the living room with nothing but an inner tube and a tacky pair of shorts on o_o wat

5:22 PM: "Yer not hyper ENOUGH! ;-;" Agreed, papa-san :D

5:22 PM: "Of course I can swim! :3" -> flash forward to him drowning.

5:23 PM: he can swim REALLY well -_-

5:23 PM: "Oi! Nagasumi :O" cue wake-up on a rock

5:23 PM: "Dad, I.. I did, I did drown :O" no ya didn't. T_T Sadly.

5:24 PM: Pops is talking about the mermaids... I smell a plot point!

5:24 PM: Camera cuts to strange girl - I smell a second plot point!

5:25 PM: "So ya got saved by a mermaid? ^_^" "It's true, I wa- -SMACKED!-" "You're embarrassing me! T_T" Grandma = awesome, mother = petty bitch.

5:26 PM: "There've always been legends of mermaids in the inland sea. :o" plot point continues...

5:26 PM: "If the legends are tellin' the truth, you're in a heap of trouble :O" and it comes full circle

5:26 PM: k... straightening one thing out - main character = Nagasumi Michishio, not the other way around... oops :p

5:27 PM: "I don't know who he takes after T_T" Mama character? Do us a favor and shut the eff up... please. That's not cute, it's annoying.

5:27 PM: "Annou, good evening. :3" "And she was really good looking - like that girl :D" I guess now, Nagasumi gains his mermaid harem?

5:28 PM: This isn't funny. :(

5:29 PM: "My name is Sun Seto ^_^"That's not an unusual name at all!

5:29 PM: really, this isn't funny... -_-

5:29 PM: "Nagasume, please... Please... please make me your bride! ;-;" er... wow. Who didn't see that comin'? Anybody? Anyone?

5:29 PM: This show sucks. -_-

5:30 PM: "I want you to take responsibility for what happened this afternoon! ;-;" parents = "He screwed that girl? o_o"

5:30 PM: Most epic line ever: "YOU FAPPY BASTARD!" That will become the new "YOU SPOONY BARD!" someday... OK, it won't... but that's just awesome XD

5:31 PM: ...now poor Nagasumi's getting beaten like a cheap rug and berated by understandably angry parents

5:31 PM: "Sorry to bother you late at night T_T" -> Yakuza peoples

5:32 PM: Cue mama getting horny. Seriously. Tag flies by in the back that says "Mature sex drive one wild!"

5:33 PM: Looks like the Yakuza guy's going to bring Nagasumi's parents to the Boss... She aint' a mermaid - she's yakuza... or both.

5:33 PM: "All right then, everyone... you go first T_T -push off cliff-

5:33 PM: yep. Both.

5:34 PM: "Mermaid? Is she the one from this afternoon? ;-;" yes.

5:34 PM: Sun's papa is freaking awesome.

5:34 PM: And mama's getting turned on by some Yakuza guy making out with her son. I can NOT make this shit up

5:35 PM: Again - Sun's dad is freaking awesome. He's a typical Yakuza boss through and through: Name? Gozaburou Seto

5:35 PM: Sun's mom? Ren Seto

5:37 PM: Plot synopsis by father - Sun saved Nagasumi's life; Nagasumi saw Sun's true form, so he's now married to her... to avoid a death sentence.

5:37 PM: Sun's death, that is.

5:37 PM: "It's YER fault, ya little shit?! T_T" - I like this guy

5:38 PM: "Boil me, burn me, whatever ya want! T_T" ...so unpredictable -_-

5:38 PM: "Ya see, Nagasume, we thoguht of a way so neither of ya have ta die. :3" Sun's mom is awesome, too

5:39 PM: "He can marry my precious, precious sun... or we'll hafta kill every uman that knows about this! :O" yeah, he's boned

5:40 PM: "We don't even know each other yet :O" uh... yeah... this will lead to a harem show

5:40 PM: ...with the epic mob parents

5:40 PM: Fact: This show got 100 times more awesome after the mob parents got involved.

5:40 PM: "The man that gave me my first kiss! *.*" Uh... Nagasumi is distracted

5:43 PM: Door opens, water rushes in, Nagasumi makes an escape... almost gets eaten by a freakin' shark

5:43 PM: "I'm always the one getting saved." >_> Wuss

5:44 PM: "I wonder if dad's still after us! o_o" "You called him 'dad' o//o" bad writing is BAD

5:45 PM: Nagasumi is screwed

5:45 PM: "Why did you save me? :o" "Why? o_o" cue cheesy martyr explanation from Sun -_-

5:45 PM: "HONOR AMONG THIEVES (under the sea!)"

5:46 PM: Nakajima = giant enemy octopus

5:46 PM: "Octopy! :D Killy :D" ... a socially inept one at that

5:47 PM: "Running away won't solve anything o_o"

5:47 PM: "I WANT PERMISSION TO MARRY YOUR DAUGHTER :O" and everyone's happy... 'cept the dad.

5:47 PM: Who doesn't like Nagasumi. And he's trying to murder the kid now. o_o

5:48 PM: cue wacky music. This is supposed to be a happy end? o_o

5:48 PM: "DROWN, YA FAPPY LITTLE SHIT!" ...again, love that quote. :D

5:48 PM: and fade to credits.

5:49 PM: @FUNimation - why on EARTH did you license this show? It's TERRIBLE o_o For a harem comedy it's just not very funny at all. :\

5:49 PM: Verdict:

5:50 PM: The characters are two-dimensional, the plot is fairly stupid, and really... I just thought every single joke fell flat.

5:50 PM: The real standout is Sun's parents who, for all intents and purposes, were freaking awesome.

5:52 PM: But yeah.. if episode one is an indicator, please do skip this one.